The days flow by and I'm farther and farther from the false sense of security I had in my former marriage.
There is this odd feeling of regret as I realize that I really didn't ever live alone before being married. I didn't really develop a lifestyle, or style beyond the most basic bohemian aspirations that marked my 20s.
I've started to question things, deep things like life's purpose, and what I identify with as "who I am". Star Wars toy archives, married man, musician... They all seem to point at some aspect of me, but don't really speak to my character or deeper places.
I'm noticing some fear around all this, noticing I don't really have a home, just a room in a house I share.
I find myself longing for a place to live that's all my own, where I can hang art and listen to music, grow a garden, write songs...
Unfold into a broader definition of being, one that actually has a flavor, a vibe. I want to have a space where a woman can come and be immersed in my world.
I'd like her to be able to feel something that she can take with her, that she'll long to return to when she desires a little different space than her own...
Being an individual energy, a place where my particular flavor of sanctuary can take form and hold me inside it....
Whoever I am....
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